Monday, November 9, 2015

Postpartum Support

Sometimes I don't get myself. I think that I don't like to be social but I'm always out and about at social events. My husband claims he's social but hates having people visit unexpected but loves spending hours in the backyard with his friends. I like visitors but hate(accurate description) the backyard cookout scene. I think it's more of an uncomfortable dislike for drunk inappropriateness. I'm a prude in that sense. I like an easy going social drink not drunken annoying trashiness.

Back to where I wanted to go with this. Since having my baby I've found some neat local groups on Facebook. The O-Town Babywearers are my kind of crunchy people. 

I recently went to a positive postpartum group. I'm not feeling depressed but I am upset about my delivery so I thought it would be a good place to find support. I worry about the ladies in the group who are struggling with depression and anxiety. I hope they can find the help they need. 

The major things I took away from the first meeting was so many women struggle with balancing all of their roles. The struggle usually comes about from comparison and setting really high expectations. 

We went over exercises to bring ourselves back to the present moment.  

One woman mentioned one of her coping strategies is to write, especially letters to herself or the person she's mad at. 

The 3 things I want to incorporate into my week are: 
1. Don't set unattainable expectations for myself and family. 

2. When I find myself dwelling on the past or worrying about the future I'll bring myself to the present by tapping into my 5 senses and awkowledging what I'm seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting and physically touching. 

3. I need to write a letter to my midwife and possibly 3 other people I resent. I won't actually be delivering the letters but writing my feelings out might help me feel better. 

I'm Grateful for My Baby Daddy

Now isn't that the trashiest blog title?

I'm grateful for my husband. Being married is weirdly a lot of work. Recently so many of my family are struggling through divorces and it makes me sad for them. It sounds so painful that people can just stop loving each other. Shitty things happen and sometimes I get really judgey towards people who give up, but I suppose people know what they can handle.

Anyway back to my life. We're in family mode, focused on building and raising our clan. We're so different so I know we'll face parenting challenges, but I believe we both have great qualities to pass on.

While I was recovering from childbirth if I've ever questioned if he loves me, in those moments, I knew he absolutely does. He would tell me to do my self care rituals, go to my room, shut the door, and take a nap. The best thing a new mom could do.

Watching how he interacts and loves his son puts the biggest smile on my face. They're lucky to have each other.

Sunday, November 1, 2015

November 1st: Time to Write Again

I really need to get back to writing. I have so many ideas and drafted posts of life lately with a new addition to our family. Most days it doesn't seem like I have any time to write, which is a lie, because it seems I have plenty of time to scroll through Facebook nonsense. I always feel like I can't post unless it's from a desktop but that's not practical for me right now. I need to make use of my smart little phone and post from it. Since I can't bring myself to finish up my drafted ideas I'm going to do the typical November gratitude posts to get some type of writing in. I need an outlet. I am also going to limit my Facebook usage this month so hopefully those wasted minutes will be used here. 

Day 1
This one is so obvious, and the most important. I am grateful for my baby boy. I absolutely love him. He's so handsome and sweet. I love watching him wiggle around. I love watching the smiles and joy exchanged between him and his dad. I'm happy for this stage in life so I can continue learning and growing. His dad always tells me that the baby loves me, misses me and sometimes only wants me, but I've got issues about believing I'm worthy and loveable. For a human to absolutely love me feels weird, but I know my little guys does. I'm his food, his comfort, his protector and number one fan. He is the best thing in my world.